My mom and dad were out of town for the weekend so we stayed at their house and watched the cat.  Last week was one of the most stressful that I have ever had at work. So by Friday...I was wound up tight, irritable, nervous and anxious.  

My boys had arrived the day before and of course all their stuff was strewn about everywhere downstairs which would make a normal person nuts so you can imagine what it did to me. 

I left them down there and went upstairs.  I walked from room to room.  Touching everything.  I opened my mom's closet and smelled her clothes.  I sat at my dad's desk and looked at all his keepsakes.

 The picture above is my parents by the way.  They were and still are adorable. 

I saw things that reminded me of other family members.


My niece


My nephew




My sister


My Grandparents on my dad's side



My Grandparents on my mom's side



(The tile reminds me of their old kitchen floor).

All of the sudden I was flooded with memories.  I had such a intense yearning to touch all of their faces, breathe in their scents and hear their voices.   I felt my heart squeezing tight. My legs felt like I had just swam ten miles. My head started to ache.   My ears were ringing. 

It was all to much. 

I went back downstairs.

I was jittery and couldn't settle down.  I busied myself cleaning up.  Yelling at the boys to get themselves organized.  Moving from one room to the next.  Forgetting what I was doing. 

I got ready for bed and had a good cry. It didn't make me feel better or worse. 

 I couldn't sleep.  When I did, my husband said I was shaking.  I don't remember dreaming.  Maybe I was just cold.  Maybe it was a combination of a very hard week and the start of a emotional weekend. 

Saturday was better.  Keith and I spent the day alone and ran around town.  I'll blog about that tomorrow.  After the kids came home we ordered pizza and watched Pure Luck.  Which is my favorite comedy movie.  I still laugh hard at all the funny parts.  It felt good to relax and laugh. 

I slept terrible again Saturday night.  Sunday (today) I left early and headed to work. 

When I got there the bosses son filled me in on the nurses and other important things to remember. He was flying home today.  I cried and  hugged him and he choked back tears and said, "After I leave, go give mom a hug and talk with her."

I said, "I will."

It was a tough morning.  

 I left around noon, came home and promptly got into bed.  I slept for three hours. 

I felt much better.  Still feeling raw from the weekend and the week before.  But better. 

We will see what this week brings. 

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