This is us on Friday before we went to the "Celebration" of my bosses life party.

Before my make up had dripped off from all the tears.

I work with some amazing people.  People who can pull off a fantastic party in very little time.  The location, food and entertainment was absolutely perfect.

She would have loved to have been there.

I held it together fairly well with all the hugging and talking and questions.

But then the entertainment started and the songs were so beautiful.  They were all her favorites.  In between some of them they would say...."Now this is a party!  Let's liven things up a bit!"

Then they would sing a upbeat song.   People would stand up and start dancing.  I couldn't do it.  I just sat there stoically.

I cried and cried and finally I just had to leave.

So we left.  It was almost the end.  But not quite.  I felt bad that I didn't say goodbye to some people.

But they understood.

It was awful.

I felt so sad today.

My heart just has this huge hole in it.

The boss man was exhausted but he said a little speech at the end and it was really nice.  My husband had asked him earlier if I was taking good care of him.

He said, "Well, she picked out this tie for me to wear tonight!"

And you know what?

It was perfect.

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