I haven't really felt like writing the past few days.  Still don't. Nothing is really wrong.  I just haven't had alot of time.  When I do have time....I don't feel like writing.

I'm slowing going through papers that my boss kept.  Files and files and files of papers.

The shredder is my friend.


Is easy for me to shred some things.  But if they have her hand writing on it....It's tough.  But I can't keep everything.  It would fill a hundred binders.

See the floor I'm standing on?


That's the floor in my new office.  We ripped out the carpet and this was underneath. It's beautiful.   I'm not going to do a single thing to it.

I had high hopes the past few days to get things moved in there.  But that didn't happen.  Maybe tomorrow.

Saw Jaime today.  I hadn't seen her since my boss had died.  We had alot of catching up to do.  I talked the entire time so she didn't have much of a chance to help me.  I walked out of her office feeling like it was a waste of time.  I know it wasn't.  But I hate hearing myself talk.

I guess that's it.  Maybe tomorrow I'll feel a little lighter and will write more.

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Last week, I went to lunch with a kind and generous soul.  She was a friend of my boss.

Let's call her Mary.

The past few months, Mary would text me and ask what she could do for my boss.  She would beg me to tell her what she could send.  I would think hard and come up with something that my boss had mentioned.

Slippers.  Lotion.  Soup.

Near the end I couldn't think of anything so I told her to just send funny cards.  She sent the ones that played a little tune when you opened it.  My boss got such a kick out of them.

After she died,  Mary would text me to see how I was doing.  She sent me comforting words.

At lunch we talked for three hours.  She also gave me a very generous gift.



She explained that the center diamond represented my boss.  The diamonds around it were the lives that she touched.

I cried when I saw it.

I hugged her tight.

It's perfect.

I don't wear jewelry very often.  And when I do...it's always simple and usually the same two or three things.

I'm going to wear this.  Not everyday of course.  But at least two or three times a week.  Because it's so pretty.  And because it reminds me of her.

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My weekend was half and half.  One part sad and empty.  One part happy and satisfying.  Saturday was one of those days when my circumstances hit me right in the center of my forehead and knocked me down.  I cried for all my losses. Which are many.

Sunday was better. We started some projects around the house. All of us worked hard.  Keeping busy helps numb my pain.  Plus it felt good to be productive.  We moved Darren's bedroom downstairs in my office and  now we are in the process of moving my office upstairs.  Pictures to come.

The one above has nothing to do with this post.  Just a cute picture of two little girls that have a special place in my heart.

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The last few days have been a struggle.  I can get through the work day but as soon as I get home I go straight to bed.  I try to sleep a little but every time I shut my eyes the dreaming begins.  Yesterday I dreamt we had bought a house and it didn't have any lights.  Or a working bathroom.  And I had to go very badly.  Then the tornado siren sounded and I couldn't find my kids.  I was then transported to medieval times and big bearded men were chasing me down cobblestone streets and of course I was wearing heels.

And on and on and on.

 Around 6 or 7pm,  I muster up the strength to shower.  I clean up and press my face against the tile and lose myself while the water pounds on my back.

Afterwards,  I get myself a big bowl of ice cream and set up an office in my bed.  My work organizer.  My computer.  My bosses IPad (she doesn't need it anymore) to watch Frasier on Netflix.
And my phone.  To play Candy Crush.  Yes,  I admit it.  I am one of  "THOSE" people.  If you don't know what Candy Crush is... good for you!  My advice is to STAY AWAY from it.

My house is a mess.  My purchases from last week are piled in the living room.  I can't see the floor on the side of my bed.

 I am behind and late and forgetful.

I can only hope that this won't last long.  If I could just produce some energy between now and say, tomorrow morning....that would be amazing.

It would really make for a good weekend.  

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Today at work I felt happy.

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When I was growing up, we had a picture like this one in our kitchen.  I loved it.  I asked the gal how much.  She said 5 dollars.  I would have paid 20.


This mirror is old and heavy.  In the next few months we are going to be shifting some rooms around. The mirror is going to go in the guest room.




And so are these.



I can't decide if this quilt will go on my bed or on the guest bed.  I was so happy to find a quilt that wasn't ripped.



I bought this blanket for $18.00
It reminds me of one my Grandma had.



This old glass wash board came from Omaha.  I had to buy it.





This strawberry reminded me of my Great Grandma's.  It's not exactly the same...but it made me happy so I bought it.



There are a few other things...some old books.  A toy cradle.  Some pictures.
I wish it was going on this weekend.  I am hooked.

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